What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

A muslim walks out of a plane.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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