How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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Rock mattress.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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womens sports...

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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There are four black people near each other ? KITKAT !!! :D

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What was so special about Anne Frank's diary? Nothing. ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? TEN HOLOCAUSTS!!!!

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Yo Mama just died.

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What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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