Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

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How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

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I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

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Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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What's the difference between a bowl of cereal and a bowl of pudding? A bowl of cereal has milk in it.

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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