What did the blind, deaf, and dumb child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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colby doesnt shave

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why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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