What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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A duck walks into a bar and is quickly shooed away because it is unsanitary to have a duck in a bar.

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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