Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black.

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A blonde, brunette and a redhead are taken captive by a native tribe. They didn't survive the encounter.

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How do you survive the plague? you dont.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a plane while riding a donkey? He died.

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Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

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Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

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How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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