What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Whats a cat? A cat!

how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Wanna here a good joke?

Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

Guess who is violent. Osama

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

womens rights

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

Wade

What's worse than The Holocaust? CREED...

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you through them.

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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