What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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So there was a blond, a brunette, and a red-head. They walked out of the salon very happy with their respective dye jobs.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Win and Beau have no friends

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because six is a numerophobe.

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nock nock who's there is me u idiot we aranged this yesterday

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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