How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. (Don't ask me how that's possible, just go with it) As the bartender is pouring it, he asks "Why the long face?" The horse responds "My son died of cancer this morning..."

What do you call an amazing person Good

What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

The Ohio State Buckeyes

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

What happened to the man who jumped off a building? He got hit by a bus on the way down.

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

The duck didn't cross the road.

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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