why did Suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.... well then knock knock! whis there? suzie. suzie who? she doesnt know either...she has no arms!

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what do you call justin bieber having sex baby baby baby oh

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

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JOSH BROWN STOP ADDING PEOPLES NAMES TO THE END OF YOUR TRUE STORIES!

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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someone called someone else a frog

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Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

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What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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Why did the girl kill herself? Because she was brutally raped

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MOTHER OF GOD! Someone get this horse out of here!

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops