A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I don't know what to do! One day I'm a wig wam, the other day I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee again!" The doctor sighs and replies,"Sir, we've been over this. You have stage four periodic cancer."

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

What did Spiderman do when he saw a crime taking place? He stopped it

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

Turkey Balls

What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

My spelling is horrible

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

Women's football

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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