Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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How do you get a black man out of his house? you ring the doorbell.

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What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

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Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

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whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

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what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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What's black and blue and lives in a kitchen? A 1940's housewife.

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Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

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how many strippers can you fit into a garage? as many as you wanted depending on the size of the garage, but after so many gathered in the same building it is a good probability that some strippers would leave.

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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someone called a frog a frog

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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