Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

WHO LIVES IN A TIN SHACK THUMB MOUNTNORIS ALCATRAZ MAGHBARREY MUSTARD GAS MILK STAIN REGESTERED S.O SCREAMS MADELINN SBB OPERATION SBB FREE MEAT SANTA GREASE 590 ENGLISH FOLDER SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

have you seen Helen Keller's bird house? neither has she

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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