69

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

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your mum

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wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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what did sushi A say to sushi B? Nothing, because sushi is composed of aboitic fish, rice and other nutritious components and cannot speak

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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The eighties called They were pretty exited about inventing a telephone that can call the future

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Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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Hey guya im a female stripper and if you want to have some fun call me 8633972535 thanks. -Tyler

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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Why would a woman be out of the kitchen? Because she is busy working, being outside, resting, or any other activity that does not include food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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