What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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I don't like Holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly they offend me,

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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It smells like triangles in here.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Madeline i am back!! :D

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Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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