Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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What did jimmy get for dinner? Food

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well...here's how it went. It was a rainy Sunday evening. Seven felt like he wasn't cared for and unneeded. Two and Four tried talking to him, but that might have set him off. I just left a deli with my friend Three, and as soon as we leave, I see Seven, with a 45 to his head speeding down the alley. Causing mass commotion, he careens to the right a split second before hitting pedestrians. At the sight of that, I knew he was still in control. I call him on my smartphone and tell him to "Relax, park, and I'll meet you in a minute." I run up the side of the pickup, and lean in on the window. He pulls it down and I tell him that it isn't over, and that we DO care for him. One, Five, and Ten were run over though. Oh, and Seven ate Nine too. He was depressed when he did it.

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A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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What is funnier than 24 69

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How come Tommy isn't allowed to sing anymore? Because he has a punctured artery, collapsed lung, fractured ribcage, and a failed organ...

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My piggy bank is empty. No change there then

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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