What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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