Military intelligence.

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why did the little girl get her hair cut? she has cancer.

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My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

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Call me Mr. Flinstone, for that is my surname.

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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Neither have I

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Why didn't Suzie Fall off the Swings? She Has no legs and couldn't get on

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why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

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Little Johnny asks his teacher "What's 23 times 3?" She yelled, "Be quiet, Johnny, and grow up!"

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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civil rights

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Roses are red violets are ponies I dont know what to say mircowave

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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what did the white man say to the black man with the gun? Nothing he was dead

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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