Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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2

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

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What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

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Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

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I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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