What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Why so serious? Your brother died.

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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A: Have you ever heard of a blue waffle? B: Yes, i eat them every morning... A: DO you REALLY know what a blue waffle is? B: Yes...

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

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i can't stand cripple jokes

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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