What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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The.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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Once there was a frog. My parents died.

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what happens when you wake up inception

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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Nah

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

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Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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