Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

Poo LOL

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

Where does the Queen keep her armies? In various military bases across the country.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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