They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Customer: "I can't turn my computer on." Phone support: "Do you have power?" Customer: "Yes." Phone support: "Do you have fingers?" Customer: "No."

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

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Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

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minorities.....

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

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What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

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I just painted my nails. I have braces.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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