Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up, you retarded black poet!

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Look at that bitches asss!!

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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My name is Will I am a real homosexual

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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