Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change it and the other to hold the ladder so the first man won't fall and hurt himself.

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How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

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Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

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How do you kill the circus? You chop it's head off.

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Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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