when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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Caca.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Hillary Clinton

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What is a dog's favorite color? Dogs are colorblind and can not see colors.

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Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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