What do old people really like? Sex.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

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how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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What's the difference between a murdered baby and a dead baby? Not much

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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What did the bartender say to selena gomez? Your hot.

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops