When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

What Do you call two black guys on a bike? A two person bike

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

PSP its a nut you can play... Outside...

What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

Why was the black guy good at basketball? When buying African American Slaves the masters often sought attributes that would be useful for manual labor such as agricultural work. The slaves who met these criteria had more chances to pass on their better, more beneficial genetic info via sexual intercourse with other slaves. Through many generations the most beneficial traits such as fine motor control in the phalanges and overall strength were passed down. This is very similar to Darwin's Theory of Evolution.

What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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