What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

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Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

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Can i have a Ice Cream Kuhn?

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Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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