An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get KFC... Because hes a canibal!

If you see a pink banana, you are color blind.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

have you ever had african food? neither have they

"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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