roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

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brett is a dick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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how much fish could a chicken

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A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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