Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

obama

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? there is one alive at the bottom. what is worse than that? it eats its way out.

Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

A boy tells his teacher, "I want to be like hitler when I grow up and kill all the jews and one clown." The teacher replies, "Why the clown?" The boy says, "See no one cares about the jews."

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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