What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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A blonde and a brunette are out for drinks. The brunette goes home early as she has to be up the next day.

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 42

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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Your mom is so hairy... it doesn't even seem like she underwent chemotherapy for her breast cancer a few months ago.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

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What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

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so a blind man walks into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

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What's the best joke in the world? This one.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops