Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

im gay because im gay

i just wrote this so hard

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

What's Brown and dirty? Dirt

5 people are walking

john liked the paper........ so he took it

A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

What did the old man say? Nothing he was so old he died.

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

the story below is a truee story...unfortunately!!!!!!!!! :'(

A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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