Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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You're so ugly, When you look in the mirror it displays you're reflection because that is what mirrors do

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What does little Tommy and a tomato have in common? They are both vegetables. Oh wait, a tomato is a fruit.

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Obama

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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Why did the vampire die? He had AIDS.

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why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

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What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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(Timmy has no arms or legs.) A:Knockknock! B:Who's there? ANot Timmy

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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knock knock who's there Steve Go away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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