Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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Your momma is so fat that when she fell over, she couldn't get back up without help, and she probably got several bruises.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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Do you know what color comes after 9?

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

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What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

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don't just stand there

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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