What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

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I like my women like I like my coffee.......... I don't like coffee

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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What did I do last night?work

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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How do you treat people that cannot say no in just two seconds? (redux and spellchecked) Treatment: Hi...: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! SAY IT MUAHAHAHA! People: NO PLEASE I CANT! NOOOOOO! *door unlocks* Problem solved, NEXT!

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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