Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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you.

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Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your hair smells nice, especially when woven into a sweater.

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Q. Why did the boy get so fat? A. From playing Pokemon Pearl Edition

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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