What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

Q: What do you get when you put an ice cube, a grasshopper, a cell phone battery, and a human finger in a freezer? A: A very strange mix of objects indeed.

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple this joke.

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

what is differnt about a boyscout and a jew? the boyscout comes back from camp

Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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