what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bunge cord? My ass!

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

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A man and a woman are happily married. The die

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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A young boy recently saved a priests life. He found a solid lump on his testicle.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

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Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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TWATFROST HOLOCOSTME sOME MONEY TO GET A BOOB JOB HAHAHAHA BALOWJOB

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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