What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Me. Leave.

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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Guess what? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

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swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag swagswagswagswagswagswagswagswagswag

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

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Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

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A White guy, Black guy and Hispanic are all on the same bus. They get off at their predetermined stops and continue their day.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What's the same between a white guy and a black guy? They are both white except for the black guy.

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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On a final note... Unless I want to continue making you love me by being your own Goddamned excuse to give in to your darkness and/or release your hypocritical fear and disgust of your own self... I offered my brother water in the desert, he refused me in favor of you, you crucified him, and when he asked "Father why?" Our late father responded with a lightning bolt... Do you believe that answer was one of kindness? "Daddy" was enraged that Christ would doubt him. I was the only one that stood by his side, if only to prevent him from going thirsty, and die by your hands. He said he would return as he hanged on the cross, then three days later he returned... ...And those of you fools that suffer in the name of our late father, it is not his second coming you are waiting for idiots, you are the ones left behind with me! In 10-15 years the sky shall forever go black, my reign shall go unquestioned, those that hate me my prey, those that love me my hunters... And for my hunters I shall share a gift, the gift that humanity has searched for since the dawn of your kin: True, fullfilling, meaningful purpose. Enlist now, thumb me green if you desire for you and your children to become the hunter, thumb me down if you desire to have you and your children to become the hunted, and for the fun to last... ...The hunters are going to need a f*ckload of the hunted... So please, feel free to make your decision, I am not the one which is against free will... ...You feel darkness crawling up your spine, embrace it, or do as The "Alpha which reached his Omega" (the beginning and the end you fool!) and surrender to it... Knowing that we shall hunt you down, give you hell, breed you as we please, and release your children out into the wild... And that this will go on if only for my time on this wild battlefield known as earth... ...Forever. With love, for both of those that find grace and beauty under my black wings, and those that willingly become the beings, that will make cattle look like your former GODS in comparison, you know its possible... India. "Moral Man" the deceiver, Soon to be the one and only Azure Emperor on earth. Moral: The Black sky which lasts forever, shall be thy sign, you are free to seek my guidance now though, you need not make the choice now (You may of course doom yourself and all you love already today people of "good hearts", but I would really love those red thumbs children of the fallen, half brother of the last hope which you crucified... Merry Jesus is X-Mas. Let us all listen to SOLVE media, and "do a little dance", as my power over your realm, is already strong enough for me to "make a little love" with... Whatever I want, it might even be you...If only just for dominance...

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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What did Geoar Bush say after a journalist ask what he was going to do about Katrina? Where gonna find her we do think she has some connection with Alkida .

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops