why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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why was the boy sleeping in the basement? he was brought over from ethiopia to become a child sex slave and was now being help against his will in a basement

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Here come the elephants over the hill!

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

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A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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