What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops