Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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Apple juice.

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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69

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How did Jonny die We don't know he was never found

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

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Knock, Knock Who's There? An Orange No Seriously Who Are You?

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Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

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Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

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What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and a horse? Each animal has a different number of genetic faults therefore such a process would be impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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