Why did the chicken cross the road The light was green

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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roses are red, violets are blue, no one cares, your adopted.

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

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david weres the slug gone

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What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

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What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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Obama lin Baden.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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