Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

Q: What did the Black man say to the kool ade Man? A: You're not real -BonkersLive

John Travolta goes to the supermarket..

Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

Je veux avoir des relations sexuelles avec toi.

a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

haha.

Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

If life throws you lemons Catch them

How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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