A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown, sued the water company, bought a huge settlement and ran off with that slut Little Bo Peep.

A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

What's worse than failing a test Drowning

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...