Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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Gus's mom

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A woman walks into a bar.

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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pretty soon we'll all be dead

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Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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Three girls are eating icecream one girl sucks on her icecream the second girl licks on her icecream and the third girl bites on her icecream. Q: Which of the three girls is married? A: The girl with the wedding ring.

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YEAH THEY DO!

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Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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A woman walks into a bar.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Nippies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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