Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

25

A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Make me famous

So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

A girl asks her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Rose?" "Because when you were 1 day old a rose petal landed on your head." Another girl asked her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Daisy?" "Because when you were 1 day old a daisy landed on your head" "alualualualalughghphphpphphp" "Shut up fridge"

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

Rebecca Black

why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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