Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

To mamas so fat shes fat

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

What is a refrigerator and white all over? A refrigerator

What's brown and sticky? A stick

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

Women's Rights

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh.. Okay.

What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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