Happy Monday!

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

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what do you call an old man missing a toe? a diabetic.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

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There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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if u dislike this u r most likely depressed

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops