This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

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Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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What's Blue and tastes like orange cake? A blue cake.

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Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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