Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

Liars go to hell! -God

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

Get on your knees Ho

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

how many jews can you fit in a buick? six if you squeeze 4 in the back

What's hotter than a hot girl? The sun.

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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