- Anti Joke

Yo mama is so stupid that her IQ is relatively lower than the average.

There's now a sandwich named after Jerry Sandusky, it's got 60 year old meat stuffed between buns barely out of the oven.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

Granny porn!

You and your parents are going to die today

hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

Those last 4 were by: Walter

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

What do you call an amazing person Good

What did my grandma tell me during a funeral? Nothing. It's her funeral. She's dead.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

are you gay does your mom know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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