What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

Women's Rights

why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

A convict is ripping out stop signs .. and a police comes out of no where and screams "What are you doing?!" The guys says Ripping up stop signs..

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

Enchilada

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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