Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

what comes in tube and smells like toothpaste? toothpaste

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

Whats the difference........ between a duck?

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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