Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

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Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

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Good.

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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What did the man do when it was raining pineapples? He got a chainsaw and went on a killing spree against his neighbors family.

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Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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