There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down

shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

thumb_up thumb_down +38

2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

thumb_up thumb_down

a man walks into a bar.......ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

thumb_up thumb_down -6

there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats Green and has wheels? Grass, I was kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops