Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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Why was the man sleeping. He was tired

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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AIDS

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Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

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I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

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What happens when you cross a housecat with a feral cat? A kitten is born.

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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