When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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How old are you? 20

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What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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