what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would you do for a Klondike bar? Nothing they are disgusting and pollute your body with fats that are not necessary for you to live. -CNN.com 11.78534629/10 scientists agree with this fact.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

thumb_up thumb_down +33

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops