Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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what happens every day? People die

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Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

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Yo momma so fat, she can't preform physical exercises with proper form.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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Why can't you fly? Because Chuck Norris said so.

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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What's hanging by a rope from the tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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