Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

Whose your daddy? Not me

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do apples taste like? Apples.

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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