Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Did you hear the joke about Hellen Keller? Neither did she.

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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Roses are red Violets are blue if you think this is funny then your a jew!

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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Q: If a turtle loses its shell is it naked, homeless, or dead? A:Yes

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Knock Knock... Who's there... .....................

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What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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