What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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Why did the black man have lots of money. He studied hard at school and got into a good university. He dedicated 5 years of his life working relentlessly and getting his diploma in medicine then went on to work in a private hospital as head doctor and neuro surgeon. He was very successful in his specific field of medicine. That didn't work out so after quitting his job and realizing he had wasted over 7 years of his life achieving nothing but lose of interest in his career. He then bought a lottery ticket and won 8 million dollars.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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Who is a knob? ross d

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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Your mom is so nice.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

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What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

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Dogs in my home.

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what came first the chicken or the chips

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If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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Potato!

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A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

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My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

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A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

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An Irishman stays home

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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What do old people really like? Sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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