Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, you're being audited.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

i named my son Frodo because he was little

Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

What do you call a black cop? Officer.

Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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