A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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Why'd jimmy drop his candy wrapper? He was brutally melested and stabbed I the eyeballs with forks and cut into pieces before he could make it to the trash can. He was then thrown into the trash can he was going to.

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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What's funny about my gay friend? He is a stand-up comedian.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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69

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

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What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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Knock Knock. Who's there? William. William who? You friend...William...you invited me over.. Can I come in?

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Who is worse than Adolf Hitler? Lebron James

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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