why did the man die? he got shot

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

a little boy and a pedophile are walking in the woods. it is late at night and therefore very dark. the little boy turns to the pedophile.and says "gee mister, it sure is scary out here." the pedophile responds "yeah, and your'e going to get raped"

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

I am funny, yes? No, you are not.

Haha pizza

> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

Whats up with your nan? Copious amounts of lsd

What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

Michael Brown

how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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