how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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slow down! you move too fast. you gotta make the morning last. just tripping down the cobblestones. looking for fun and feeling grovvy.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

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Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

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I know you are but what am I? Gay.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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poop nuff said

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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