roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

if you are reading this your wasting your time

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

you wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

thumb_up thumb_down +91

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than the Holicost? Bitting into an apple and finding a worm

thumb_up thumb_down

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops