Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

Satan called. I put him on hold.

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

why shouldn't hellen keller drive? because she's a woman

wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...