A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

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penis haha

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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I can't make my mind about the debate on legalisation of marijuana. Some days I think it's a good thing. Somes days I think it's a bad thing. And some days, I don't think about it at all and I just think it's a very nice day.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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A blinde and brunette are stranded on an island. They are never found and starve to death.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

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what do you call a white man surround by a bunch of black men in prison a congraulation ceromony (and gang rape) pppppppppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

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How do u make Michael Jackson cry Dead people can't cry you dumb bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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