How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

A stripper walks into a bar, she proceeds to cry because she's an alcoholic and a stripper. Meanwhile, her 3 children sit at home hungry. She then goes home, and grabs her gun and shoots her children, then shoots herself. Bucket.

What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

black people

What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

Why did the black man order a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken? His wife just died in a tragic car accident and he is a horrible cook.

What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

bees knees

frogs are green and grass is greener i just blew up ur mom and ur the cleaner now get to work SLAVE

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

What's worse than not receiving presents on Christmas Day? Being forced to consume your own flesh

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

there is a fat ass bitch who lives in littlefield TX, her name...Krista. her facebook.... NannyGrizzly. I hate her!!! with a pasion... she was my neighbor... i can hear her yelling all the time. Please... someone give her a reason to yell. .................Facebook..........Nannygrizzly.......do....something.....about.......her.... thank you. Ima TROLE!!!!! hahahahaahhhahahahahahahaahha. damn it. (: v P PS. she is a bitch

What's black, white and re(a)d all over ? A penguin in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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