Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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a black guy walks into a black bar

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because Your mother said so. Now get a life and get off this website young fellas.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

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Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

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Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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RUN

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What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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Q:Whats the hardest part about eating a vegetable A:The Wheelchair

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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