Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

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A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. V

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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women's rights

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what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

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Why could'nt Ray Charles read: He was black

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Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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