What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

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This is not a joke.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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If you took all of the garbage produced in New York City in just one week, and put it in the middle of Central Park, the stench would be unbelievable.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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su algato es en fuego

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I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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