Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

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Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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-What's a real anti joke? -This.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Why'd the man walk his dog His pen ran out of ink

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

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whyo black peopple lie koolade the like the taste

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What's the difference between and Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout returned from camp.

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Why did Tiarnan not ride is bike to school today. Tiarnan's dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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