a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

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Land Rovers

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

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What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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