If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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-Knock Knock -Come in!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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What;s worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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i died. new product by steve jobs

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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