What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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girls basketball

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What's brown and slimy? brown slime

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

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God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

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What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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