It wa Jerry's first day of kindergarten He pulled out a .44 magnum and shot himself under the chin where he was instantly dead... Yes, dead

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

since when?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

thumb_up thumb_down -31

butt sex

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Badabing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how do you kill a baby? introduce it to alice cooper

thumb_up thumb_down +10

¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's up? my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops