How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

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A man walks into a bar.....OW!

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

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why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you stop a bus You throw a fridge at it

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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69

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4

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What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops