how come so many people die every year due to starvation? They don't have enough food and there aren't nearly enough spider monkeys in North America.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo Momma is so fat that she is heavier than most other women her age

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

(PC) Why aren't regular jokes as good as anti-jokes? Because they are worse than anti-jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the dog bark at the picture because it was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is black and hangs from a white supremacists tree? His kids tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

thumb_up thumb_down

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +13

In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops