What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Knock, Knock No one was home.

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This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

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What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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Domonic is a gay homo!!!!!!!!!!!! Vagina

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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What color is red paint? Red

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A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

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Q: why is the squirrel stuck in the tree? A: because he should have finished high school.

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What comes after 69? mouthwash

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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