A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

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A jew walks into a bar and asked for 5 shots the bartender replies to him "did you and your wife have a fight" "yeah now shes atheist"

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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What's the diffrents between a horse and a zebra? WELL clearly there names duh.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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b r o k e n k e y b o a r d ! ! p l e a s e h e l p ! ! ! ! !

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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