What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

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joke

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm terrible at poems. Potato.

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It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

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what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

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wanna hear a joke? katie chandler

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

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How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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How many Babies can be drowned in a toliet at once? idk the bathtub is much more convienient

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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What did the man with aids say? "I'm dying and there is nothing you can do about it"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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