So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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when do you know your a BOSS................ when you get a promotion

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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Why didn't the Asian student ask for a calculator? Because he was busy washing the dishes and thought a calculator would be completely inappropriate for the situation at hand.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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Wha'ts the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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What did the mime say to the girl? .......

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What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

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Tucker Rivera

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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How do you send Harry Potter a post card? Get an owl to send it to his house.

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What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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