If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

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What happens when you cross a housecat with a feral cat? A kitten is born.

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PEANIS!

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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i like pie.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Have you heard of the mute man that kept telling people he could not talk? Its funny because its true.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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