Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

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your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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whats green and lives in the water

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops