What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What's worse than a bad anti-joke? A bad anti-joke about Skyrim What's worse than a bad anti-joke about Skyrim? The Holocaust

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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Proof reading

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Tennesse

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Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's blind.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The white man comes from European descent and the black man comes from an African descent. This leads to the difference in their skin color.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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Why I am at the hospital now: True as it gets. I found on my working desk a small box of fluoride pills, I was like meh, but it said banana, strawberry, mint and pear, so I was like yeah! And grabbed a mouthful before going URGH! Then my friends entered laughing saying "I hope you do well on that test tomorrow!" So yeah, I passed out, and it turns out my "friends" (victims ill torture to they beg for death). 80 MG OF VALIUM!!! Yeah good trucking luck on my test eh? I nearly died twice, somehow, I think I should ask doc if my heart is okay or something, my head is fucked up the floor is all wavy and I cant differentiate numbers Seriously, one guy was gonna come visit say sorry, but he sent his girlfriend instead... My wife was so worried, that when I said: Mind if I have my vengeance by screwing his girlfriend? My wife said: I was so worried, you still okay? That actually sounds like a good scheme... So, yeah... I am typing this because, I am totally going to have a threesome... When and if my ever wakes up again... She agreed... She was always kinda into me but still! If you dont understand this, well... Next time, if you want to poison me, USE SOMETHING THAT KILLS ME! BECAUSE I WILL BE BACK!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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