Someone stole my cookie from the cookie jar! So I bought another cookie.

Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

Matt is a Duster!

why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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