Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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Customer: "I can't turn my computer on." Phone support: "Do you have power?" Customer: "Yes." Phone support: "Do you have fingers?" Customer: "No."

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

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What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a blender ? A. 37 but you can try and prove me wrong

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A police officer.

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So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

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why did the boy trip off a cliff? because he was clumsy.

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Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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