What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

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Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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what do u call a hobo name Max Max

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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