Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

did you hear about the fly on the toilet? i heard he got pissed off!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Y couldn't you stop the bowling ball? Because it was going down a hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Rick Santorum 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops