Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

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Why was the math book crying? Three men just brutally raped his wife.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

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So your a murder, and you show everyone your knife. what do you do, easy just chat with them.

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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I enjoy Popcorn

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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