What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

What do you call a Mexican on the moon? Quite an unusual circumstance consedering Mexico doesn't currently have a space program. Not only that but Nasa hasen't even had people going to the moon since the 1970s.

Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Knock, knock ... ... No one answers the door because knocks produce a quieter sound than a doorbell and the residents of the house are upstairs watching a movie.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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