How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

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Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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What did the black man say to the asian man? Whats up man!

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What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

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Q: A Blonde and a Brunette fall of a building which one hits the ground first? A: The Brunette because she ways 200 pounds and the Blonde weighs 100.

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What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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