How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's 6+2? 16

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make friends with a squrriel? Trust me, don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the similarity between fake rings and your mother? They change colors in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops