A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops