Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How can you put 2 elephants in a bottle without touching each other. You put an elephant between them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a blonde surgeon? Not stereotypical

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops