Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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What did the old man say? Im old

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arena football

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

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A Black man and a Hispanic man were sitting in the back seat of a car. Who was driving? Their Asian friend who offered to take them to get lunch.

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. Vincent

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

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A gay Asian guy walks into a gay bar where he found a fruity looking black man... The Asian went up to the black man and said, " how'r they hanging?" shocked with anger, the black man hits him in the face, knocks him to the ground and said, " YOU DO NOT TALK TO MY FAMILY THAT WAY. BOTH MY GRANPARENTS WERE LYNCHED!!!" the Asian stands up and brushes himself off... He turns to the black guy and says " I meant the balance scale at the table you were were sitting at" the black fellow turns to the table with the notebook and the balance scale with rocks on both sides that he was sitting at... He turns back to the Asian man and apologizes for his rude behavior and buys him a drink... (2 hours later) they have sex

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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