how do jews pay for a $1200 Tv. they play $1000.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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What did the pie say to the other pie? "I'm hungry" So he ate the other pie.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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What would the world be like without 1 direction it would still be the world but just without 1 direction

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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