I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

ur gay and this joke sucks

Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

Luke Hardie is G@Y

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

Penis

Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

sweaty black guy

A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

whats worse than school? Summer school

when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

What's worse than finding out you have aids? Nothing. Actually I lied. It would suck being an illegal immigrant.

What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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