Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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watermelons are red, pineapples are yellow. i'm not a poet, say hello for me.

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Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

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What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

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Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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haha

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Trashcan!

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A black man walks into a bar and see's a mexican bartender. He orders some vodka.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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French people.

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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