When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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What is green and is a dub dub. A green dub dub.

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politically correct!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A black guy goes to the bar. The Barman say: What would you like to drink?

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

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That is so fetch

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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the guy below me is gay

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What's dead? Your mum.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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your life

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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fruit salad?

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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Poop

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Why did the mathematician cross the road? To get his mail.

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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