Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

Three hispanic men pull up to a suburban residence. They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

The Charlotte bobcats.

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, help! My hair is falling out! I need something to keep it in!" The doctor says, "sure. Here's some medicine."

Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

Oh...okay, good.

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was Suzy Knock Knock Who's There The Holocaust

Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

What would u like to drink?

What ended the black family's picnic? Rain.

What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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