How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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So after 2 years of dating, the man thought the woman actually loved him. So to find out they took a ski trip and during their day they were on the chairlift and the man asked the woman "Do you love me?" The woman replied "No...I'm just in it for the sex, but that's a nice ski mask you have on"

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, Knock. Who's there? ........Chicken...?

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Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

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Yo mama's house is so small that she had to get a better job in order to buy a bigger one.

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave Smith.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Richard.

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops