why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

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So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

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Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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Why was six afraid seven? Well, ever since six took an arrow to the knee he wanted to know who shot it. so he did some investigating, looked up some records and found seven was in the same war as him. then he thought about it, the big 7 scribed on the arrow he got shot with. Right then and there pain went into his back shooting upwards. He smacked the ground, and in his last moments of life saw seven standing above him. If your expecting another end down here then your a stereotype.

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What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

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I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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Derp

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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where do the women go? the womanarium

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

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A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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