-Will you follow the live coverage of 86th Acacemy Awards? -No. -Are you anti-semitic?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

shut up elliot

thumb_up thumb_down -20

And I want you like Anne Frank wanted ... nobody to read her diary. Cuz, like a diary is a collection of secret things that no one else reads, that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people have breached this little girl's privacy after she was chased by Nazis. Kick her while she's down.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats worse than finding a worm in apple? being chased by retards

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar with tears rolling down his cheeks. The bartender asks why are you so blue? The man says he has blue skin disorder and that everyone has been making fun of him...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops