Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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There was a man that invited his uncle, his uncle his uncle his uncle, his uncle and his uncle spidey to a party. He was really dissapointed when he realized that not only was his invitation full of typos, but that he invited Peter Parker twice and forgot to invite spiderman.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

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A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

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What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

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Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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Whats fuzzy and pink? A pink fuzz ball

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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