Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

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What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

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Your mom.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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What dud the dorito say to the other dorito? Nothing. Sorosis are incapable of speaking because they are doritos

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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Anything involving women..

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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