Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's better than doing the Hannah Montana's hoedown-throwdown? Throwin' that ho down.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the skeleton stay home from the party He was buried in a coffin underground and, as a matter of fact, wasn't actually invited

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are green Violets are yellow Those are the wrong colors oh well who gives a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice? She was reading the nutrition facts, as she was trying to watch her weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Obama being reelected.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black guy and a white guy are walking down the sidewalk. As it suddenly begins to rain, what does the white guy say to the black guy? Nothing. They did not know each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Just Replying to Brock Facebook request Brock you should know by now that i am at your school talk to me there. Plus i loved the kiss you gave me in science. Now that tested my chemistry. Hehe. Emma Brown xOxOxOxXXXXXoOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops