What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

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What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

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I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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What page are you on The gay page.

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Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

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Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

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Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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