Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

thumb_up thumb_down +35

r u smart..... or ur black

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two straight men walk into a gay bar. They quickly realize their mistake and cross the street to the tavern where they enjoy a beer and some pretzels.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

hi mom

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

c-? men, C-men

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops