- Anti Joke

How many Babies can be drowned in a toliet at once? idk the bathtub is much more convienient

Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Peter

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

A little boy is going to school when he is stopped by a stranger. The stranger tells the little boy, when his teacher asks him why he is late, just say willytop. The boy looks at the stranger oddly, but proceeds to go to school. He arrives 5 minutes late, and is teacher isn't that happy. His teacher asks him why he is late. All the boy says is Willytop. The teacher looks at him horrified, and sends him to the office. Well, the boy arrives in the principals office, and the principal asks him why he was sent down. All the boy said was Willtop. The Principal was so horrified that he expelled the boy from school. Well, the boy went home, to find his parents in the living. They told the boy they knew he was expelled, but they wanted to know why. All the boy said was Willytop. The parents were so horrified by this that they kicked him out of the house. Well, the boy is now walking to dark town streets, when he is stopped by a cop. The cop asks him why he is walking the streets alone. All the boy says is Willytop. The cop is so disgusted, that he kicks the boy out of town. Well, the boy is now sitting in a bar, and the bartender asks him why he is alone. All the boy said was Willytop. The bartender looked at him horrified, but before the bartender could say anything, the boy says "Please sir, I was kicked out of school, my house and even my hometown because of willytop. what does it mean sir?" The bartender nods, and tells the boy to come with him across the street, because if he tells him in the bar, the other people may get mad. Well, the boy and the bartender are across the street from the bar. The bartender opens his mouth, but before he could speak, a drunk driver hits them both.

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops