Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What?

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

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Q:Wats worse then cutting ur lawn A: diarea on a sunday morning

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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Badabing.

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Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

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Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

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your mommas so stupid she has trouble doing things an average person would manage easily

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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