You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

9/11

What do you call the black president? Mr.President

Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

Potato

what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Q: Whats worse that 10 dead babies in a trash can? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Lynching Lynching is an extrajudicial execution carried out by a mob, often by hanging, but also by burning at the stake or shooting, in order to punish an alleged transgressor, or to intimidate, control, or otherwise manipulate a population of people. It is related to other means of social control that arise in communities, such as charivari, riding the rail, and tarring and feathering. Lynchings have been more frequent in times of social and economic tension, and have often been the means used by the politically dominant population to oppress social challengers. Violence in the United States against African Americans, especially in the South, rose in the aftermath of the Civil War, after slavery had been abolished and recently freed black men were given the right to vote. Violence rose even more at the end of the century, after southern white Democrats regained their political power in the South in the 1870s. States passed new constitutions or legislation which effectively disfranchised most blacks and many poor whites, established segregation of public facilities by race, and separated blacks from common public life and facilities. Nearly 3,500 African Americans were lynched in the United States between 1882 and 1968, mostly from 1882 to 1920. Lynching during the 19th century in the United States, Britain and colonies, coincided with a period of violence which denied people participation in white-dominated society on the basis of race or gender after the Emancipation Act of 1833. Today lynching is a felony in all states of the United States, defined by some codes of law as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person which results in the death of the person," with a 'mob' being defined as "the assemblage of two or more persons, without color or authority of law, for the premeditated purpose and with the premeditated intent of committing an act of violence upon the person of another." Lynching in the second degree is defined as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person and from which death does not result." To sustain a conviction for lynching, at least some evidence of premeditation must be produced, but "The common intent to do violence" may be formed before or during the assemblage."

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

american government

Your mother is so black...because she recently suffered a horrible accident with fire and has irreparable skin damage.

A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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