Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone he proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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Sally walked into a bar and asked for a drink. Because she was under 21 they denied her request,

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

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A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

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When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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