What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

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An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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women's rights

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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