There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

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Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

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Darude- Sandstorm

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

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Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

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what do a plum and a rabbit have in common? there both purple except for the rabbit

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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there was a pre school teacher and he told the children to draw a squirell. One boy breaks into tears because his entire family was slaughtered by a pack of squirrels. This upset the teacher

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whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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