q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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p lkl

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A jew go out of a bar

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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