what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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Whats White and sticky? Semen

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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What's 9+10=? 19

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Arms and legs, NOT GET IN MY MINIVAN!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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