a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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What's worse than breaking your leg? Finding out that your family has died due to an infection causing all of them to perish in horrible deaths

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You

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A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Joey mayer's face

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why did the poet kill the blackchicken? as a source of inspiration for his poultry

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What's the worst part about censorship? **** *** **** **** *** **** *** ********.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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