There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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Q. Why does Samuel Jackson always play a black guy? A. Because he's black.

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

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What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

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what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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A guy asks his girl friend to marry him and she says yes, so he buys her a new car - a Lamborghini Countach - she loves this car and she goes everywhere in it. One day, she picks up her kids from school. She's got a boy and a girl. As she's driving down the road, a car pulls up in front of her and they have a really nasty accident and she falls into a coma. When she wakes up from the coma there is a doctor next to her and she quickly asks doctor, "Where is my son? He was really good at football, he could have played for England and been better than Beckham." The doctor replies, "I'm so sorry, in the accident he lost his leg he won't be able to kick a football any more." The woman asks about her daughter. "Doctor, where is my daughter? She was really good at tennis and she could have been the best in the world and won at Wimbledon." The doctor says, "Sorry but in the accident she lost her arms and she won't be able to pick up a racket any more." She begins to cry. "Doctor," asks the woman, "how long have I been in this coma?" The doctor replies, "Six months." "So what's the date?" asks the woman. "April 1st," says the doctor. The woman begins to laugh "So you were joking then, were you?" Doctor: "YES... they had minor breaks and cuts but both have made full recoveries. I'll get them and your fiancé down here straight away." The woman is relieved and is discharged three days later to continue recuperating at home, while the doctor is sent to a tribunal for tricking her into believing her children had been maimed and eventually accepts early retirement with a generous severance package.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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