why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

What's black and white and has difficulty turning corners? A nun with a javelin stuck through the neck.

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

How old is Batman? Old enough to be a bat.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

Help I'm being raped!

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

fi uoy nac daer siht sdrawkcab uoy tsuj daer siht sdrawkcab

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...