so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -29

guess what? WHAT? Idk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who livs in a pineaple under the sea? Lots of mold and bacteria

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A Muslim blows up a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops