A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did one guy say to another? Womens rights..........

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to tommy for his birthday ? A new pear of shoes to put on. Tommy feet just got amputated. But it's okay... Tommy got a new comb. Tommy just got cancer. But it's okay tommy got a new pet dog... Tommy is abused by the dog I know what your thinking a dog can't abuse someone it was a cat

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops