A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

What is the best joke ever? 1D

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

Are you from Africa? Because you're black.

What's read, round and gets smaller? A baby combing its hair with a potato pearler

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

Why did the...uhh.... Lamp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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