Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

Whats worse than seeing your mom naked. Your dad.

Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...