If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

Once there was an English man, A Scottish man and an Irsh man. They were all in a scenario where each of them had to undetake a task. The English man and the Scottish man undertook their task without any problems, but the Irish man was confused resulting in a hilarious outcome.

Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

lybia

Andoni was here

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

Gay republicans

Two men walk into a bar. Realizing that they aren't alcoholics and don't drink, they walk back out.

A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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