what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Knock knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

thumb_up thumb_down -24

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -6

i wonder who made this website? a human

thumb_up thumb_down +1

when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why are Asians bad drivers? There Not. Have you ever seen Tokyo Drift?

thumb_up thumb_down +256

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops