How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

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b

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

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Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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Why did the blonde fall down the stairs? Somebody tripped her.

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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What happened to tommy for his birthday ? A new pear of shoes to put on. Tommy feet just got amputated. But it's okay... Tommy got a new comb. Tommy just got cancer. But it's okay tommy got a new pet dog... Tommy is abused by the dog I know what your thinking a dog can't abuse someone it was a cat

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DONALD TRUMP DIES

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3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

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Why was maddison sad Becasue he was born with a fucking gay name

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops