What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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what do you call a young man? a little boy

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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What's the capital of Hungary? Thirtsy

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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9/11

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

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Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

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What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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