Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

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What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

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speak now or forever hold your pee

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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