Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to the doctor he recommend she lose weight or risk high blood pressure and heart attack

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, you racist.

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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A blonde, a redhead, and Asian are talking. They are friends.

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so i walk into a bar the bartender says what do you want i say a beer please he then goes one dear coming up soi thought tomy self should i tell him what i really said so i let him get the dear but for some reason he came out with tears i asked whats a matter he said you let me go to kill a dear

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

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Me: Want to hear a funny joke? Person: What? Me: Women's Right.

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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What's retarded and comes from Hulsberg? Roy Knubben

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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AVI IS A FAG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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