Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Why couldn't the Nativity have taken place in France? The winters are not warm enough to sleep in an animal cave without getting hypothermia, and there was no census taking place at the time.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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men's rights activists

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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