Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

whats red white and blue? i dont know

WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

So a blond is rowing a boat in the middle of the field. It turns out she was insane and was trying to escape from the sanitarium.

Q: What's DNA? A: The National Dyslexic Assosiation.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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