Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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