Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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What's green and has wheels? a green car.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No-one No-one who? .......

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What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why was timmy in the well? He had autism.

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How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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http://anti-joke.com/

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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theres a fat guy

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eloise dey.

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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