What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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My mom always said it was fun to jump into a pile of leaves... That was before she was devoured by a 10 ft. scorpion.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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why did arno fly away? he was a bird

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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Dogs

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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Guess what happened when a man took off his jumper?? He became cold!

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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"I'm terrible at writing jokes." -80% of the people on here.

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so the weather's nice...

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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Why is 3 less than 4? To get to the other side

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Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

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A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

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Do you want to hear a bad joke? A bad joke

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A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

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What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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