How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops