Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw him

How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A: Doesn't matter, got hit by car.

Busted? What the hell is going on?

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

what's brown and sticky? a turd.

why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

What's pink and shaped like a V? A pink V.

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...