Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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Why does Rupert the Bear wear chequered trousers? Because that's how the creator originally drew him.

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Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

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Five men walk into a bar. The bartender says, more taste or less? None of them care.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

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two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

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Have you seen Ray Charles' house? No. Neither has he...

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

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What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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Why did the blonde get a good occupation? Because she had a great education in a private school.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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