Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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Canida

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What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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