Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue These are your Results You have Cancer

What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

p lkl

A jew go out of a bar

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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