I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

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whats the difference between virgin and a porn star?? A virgin hasn't got aids.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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what's more interesting than capital gains tax? (there's no answer)

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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Here's a joke for you, my life...

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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