-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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Oh, I must be hearing things.

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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Knock knock --Come in.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

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yolo mother f-uckaaaa

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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