Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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