Pineapple.

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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once upon a time there was a cripple little girls who lived in an orfanage were she got raped then beat .

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Steve is an average man. He has a good life, is married and has 2 kids. So why did he have his dog put down? Because it was hit by a car and had 21 broken bones and was in severe pain. Steve thought putting it down was the best thing to do.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

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a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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A man walked into a bar. Ow!

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Leave. Now.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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