What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Lets go Yankees

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whats worst than school? the earth exploding whats worse than the earth exploding? the sun exploding whats worse than the sun exploding? 10,000 suns exploding

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped six's mother

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n i g g e r s a r e f u c k i n g c h i n k y f a g s

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What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuck in its coop on the farm. Also, chickens aren't sentient, so they can't reason the same way we do.

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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