Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A guys walks up to a drug dealing looking to score some drugs. The deal was made an the man quickly arrested the drug dealer because he was actually a undercover cop

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the little girl get her hair cut? she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why is john so fat years of over eating

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops