Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

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Romans rights.

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Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

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What was the energizer bunny arrested for? Rape.

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops