What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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knock knock your gay

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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Whats 9 + 10? 19.

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

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The women if the wnba are good at basketball

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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