Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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men's rights activists

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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i saw amango it splootered

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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