Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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What happens when you mix a black guy and a chinese guy. A disfigured man

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

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Women's rights.

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your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

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Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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