An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

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What didnt rebecca black do today ride the bus

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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women's rights

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Why was Michelle crying? I don't know. Neither do I.

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GUYS LISTEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT THIS TO BE THE MOST DISLIKED JOKE EVER !!!!!!!! PLEASE :) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

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What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

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Friends are a lot like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

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How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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