I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces of me and bounces of you too because sound isn't affected by your adhesive properties.

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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Nuneaton..

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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what are three short words? i a am

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? Generally one, but as the situation varies so does the number.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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