What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Barack Obama is a good president.

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

Obama 2012

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

"Doctor, doctor, I am having a hard time controlling my muscles!" "It's Lesche-Nyhan Syndrome, this is a genetic terminal illness...i'm sorry."

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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