Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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my penis

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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What do you call a billionaire who lost a large portion of their net worth? A millionaire.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

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yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

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What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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two cannables walk in to McDonalds

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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