What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

A girl cries as she drops a box of uncooked spaghetti noodles, spilling and breaking them onto the floor. She has brittle bone disease.

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

Needless to say,

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

Do you like apples? Yes

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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