Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

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What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Three blondes are stranded on an island. They all die from starvation.

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i like pie.

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Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

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What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops