why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Grim Reaper. The Grim Reaper who? Joking with me will not postpone your death.

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Q: Who showed up at the dead soldier's funeral? A The Westboro Baptist Church...

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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A blonde, brunette and a redhead are taken captive by a native tribe. They didn't survive the encounter.

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What's up? A direction...

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A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

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What do you call a dolphin on a unicycle? You need medical help

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whats a mexicans favorite sport? cross counrty

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch. :) By Drew Bolton

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

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who is an indian that can not shoot a bow and arrow? David

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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