Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Melbourne Football Club.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

1st guy: Wanna hear a joke? 2nd guy: Yeah sure. 1st guy: Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -11

two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

thumb_up thumb_down

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

thumb_up thumb_down +13

52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Think of a number between 2 and 10? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 11745028410270193852110555964462294895493038

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

this is stupid .... yep

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops