And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

Where did John go? Refrigerator

There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

9/11

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

what do you call a black man with no arms or legs sitting on a porch? "sir" His life is hard enough with out being subject to social rudeness

Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

what's more fun then stapling a dead baby to a fence? ripping it off

How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

a man said hi.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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