What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

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This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

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- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

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Small titties.

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What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

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Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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whats the boys name that has no legs no arms and no eyes? lucky

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

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Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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