Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

69

A man has a meeting with his doctor and his doctor says "I have some bad news, you have cancer and you have alzheimer's," to which the man replies... "Well at least I don't have cancer." This is an example of a fallacy claim.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

SEX

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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