If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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where did sally go after the bombing? everywhere.

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oh no, i've lost my tractor

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red... That depends in how hard you throw them.

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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Knock knock "Who's there?" "Bark bark" "Bark Bark who?" "Bark bark bark bark bark bark."

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Yo momma so fat, she died.

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What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

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Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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