There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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NEVER

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What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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Women.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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A lady with no legs walked..... never mind

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Ahmed walks into Abbar.

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i hate you.

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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turns out hitler was right... the jews are the cause of the problems in the world

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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