A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

Moral

I am a n1gger.

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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