Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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69

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

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What is worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops