a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

How is matt and alicia going last after summer They won't

What does Harry Potter love? Magic

Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

Error 37.

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

are you saying pam, or pan?

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

whats sad about a jew in a gas tank? nothing.

Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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