what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

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your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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