Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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Tyler is a downer and is always negative to everybody

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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