Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

Looks through the peephole.

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

What colour are blackberries? Purple.

Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

What the difference between some stoned and someone drunk? When your drunk you think having a good time even when you not and when you stoned your so high you think your a dragon ball z character.

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

How does a black man get a job? Through an interview.

why did the plane crash the pilot was Suicidal

Trump will make America great again.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

Do you like fishsticks No

How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

Why was the salsa spicy? It has a mixture of many spicy peppers.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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