A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

deez nuts

How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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