Two farmers are standing in a field. One says: "It's a bit cold today, don't you think?" The other doesn't reply, because he is trying to work out how to tell the first farmer that his son has just been killed in a road accident.

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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This is just like Facebook. If you guys want to like comments, or even comment on them, just get Facebook.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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If life though you lemons, through skittles at them and say tast the freakin rainbow.

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Dedication and hard work

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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Good afternoon.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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Contrary to popular belief when life hands you lemons you cannot make lemonade. Water and sugar are two other essential ingredients.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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