whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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wanna hear a better joke? casey.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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Minecraft.

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Okay, after this one then...

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What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

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Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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A man walks into a bar, and says to the bartender, "Do you know where the library is located?" The bartender describes to him that the closest library is three blocks down, next to the red brick building with a green roof.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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