Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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This is not funny.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to change a lightbulb? Why should his legal status matter at all in this situation?

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You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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A duck walks into a pharmacy and says to the man behind the counter, "Do you have any ointment? my beak is very chapped" the man replies "we have nothing for ducks here."

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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