What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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knock knock Who's there? The repo man Why? You're being evicted

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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hi

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

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Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

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How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

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There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

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Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

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I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! I've got the whole world! In my hands! Now you must listen to all of my demands or I will crush you all.

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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