why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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N-E Pats never cheated

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Knock knock Who's there No one. The house has been vacant for years.

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Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

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knock knock who's there? I'm here.

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SKnock Knock. Whose there? Why don't you open the door and find out instead of questioning the millions of other people that knock on your door everyday?

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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If i was a painting... Id hang myself

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What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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