Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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What's worse than getting raped by a black guy? Getting raped by a radioactive black guy

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

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why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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Knock knock --Come in.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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