What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

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How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

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Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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What did the lion say to the Octopus? Nothing, lion's can't speak. And even if they did, the chances of one ever encountering an octopus are very slim.

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I Like my women like i like my wine, 6 years old and locked in the cellar

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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What's worse then falling off a buliding? Falling of a higher building.

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What happens after you go to school? (you tell me, i'm only in 6th grade)

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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