What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

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Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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what do you do if you catch syphilis from a Swedish prostitute? seek the help of a medical professional.

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What is the name of Steven Hawkins condom.... Anti virus

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

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So, a screw driver walks into a bar, and the bar tender sais "Hey Screw Driver" we have a drink named after you" the screw driver goes, "Really? You have a drink named Bob"

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

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What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

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roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

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Why did the man tell the child to get into the van? They were late for a field trip.

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Why was the woman?

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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