Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Glaucoma.

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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A bear walks into a bakerey. He aks for a loaf of bread. The bakers asks: "White or brown?" The bear answers: "It doesn't matter, I'm on the motorcycle".

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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What did the gay lifeguard tell the little boy at the pool? No running!

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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Why did the women sleep in the kitchen. Due to the poverty levels of her area of residence, sub-sahara Africa, she, her 7 children and 3 orphaned nephews lived in one ram shackled room with a corrugated iron roof which served as a multi-purpose kitchen, bedroom, lounge and greeting area.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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In soviet russia, roses are violet

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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