Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

What's the difference between a Satyr play and a Sedar meal? One is full of horned goat-men, the other is a feast that marks the beginning of Passover.

what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

if it's friday, it must be China

What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

Women's rights.

how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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