roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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A rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Bumsniffer

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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What did the man without a tongue say...

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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