A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 8 9. I'm just counting

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

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guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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White men's rights

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

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what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

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Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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