A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

Mahmy

Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

This is a bad anti-joke. Just kidding, it's a good one.

How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A bird with a broken wing.

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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