What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

Jason Connor.

What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

What do you call a black priest? Father, and then whatever his name happens to be.

Why did the pig fly cuz his wife is a bitch

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

Q: What did the blonde woman say when she got slaped by her friend? A: Ow.

What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

69

What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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