What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

whats the difference of the mexican and the bench the mexicans alive

What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

knock knock whos there !!!!!.....WE.....ARE.......SPARTANSSSS.....!!!!!!

What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

why cant Joey jump for joy? beacause hes dead

how do you get a blonde out of a tree? you politely ask her, then if all else fails call the local fire department

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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