What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

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Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

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Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

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i have yougurt with tractor

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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Why didnt the man eat the free cachew nuts? Because he did'nt want to die from an allergic reaction.

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What did the black man say to the other black man. We're both niggas.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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