A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

An antijoke

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

What do andy and Justin Bieber have in common? they are both 5'7

Are you a human?

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

a black man is chasing a white man,, "sir you dropped your wallet'!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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