Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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What do you call a person with a cane? someone with a walking disability

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

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Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

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What did the clown say to the other clown? I was not present at this conversation, and therefore I was not able to catch what they were saying

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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Did the owl ever reach the middle of the tootsie pop? Yes. Dreams do come true

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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