How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With floss.

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UP

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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A man died.

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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A young black girl walks in to a bar. Because she was not of the legal age to consume alcoholic beverages she was asked to leave in a peaceful manner.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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look under under where under under where. under the couch

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My nipple is bleeding

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Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

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read this sentence again.

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"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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where did susan go durring the explotion? every where...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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