A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

I lost my tractor.

Q:what do you do when a black guy is drowning A:you dont

Roses are red Violets are blue And so avatars And so is blue paint

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

What did the parrot say to the cow? Moo

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

Your existance.

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

Soccer...

A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says, "I'm Japanese!" The second man says, "I'm Japanese too!" The bartender says, "I'm also Japanese!" The bar was in Japan.

Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

Stop being a centipede

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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