An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

What do you call a black guy that steals a car? A father desperate to save his dying son who doesn't have a car to drive to a hospital

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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