how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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What's worse than finding a worm in Your apple?? A pile of dead babies

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Man U

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Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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