Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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What do you call a black man speeding away in a Ferrari. A wealthy man who is late for work.

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Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

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jess is a drama queen am i right rishi ?

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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Why do white people go to black people's yard sales? Because they know they sale good quality stuff -Travis

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

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Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

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roak

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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