I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

2 + 2 = fish

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender for grapes. The bartender explains to the duck that he does not sell grapes. Later that day, the bartender recounts the story to a friend; the friend advises the bartender to undergo psychological testing.

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT TRUCK! What truck? Weird I could have sworn I saw a truck...

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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