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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A severely beaten and bruised man who was found un conscience and robbed in a dark parking lot behind Dennys at 2 o'clock in the morning.

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I'm a raging homosexual.

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Why did the blond do so horribly on the SAT's? She was pulled outside halfway through her testing session by the school janitor who molested and murdered her in the bathroom.

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Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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LO AND BEHOLD!

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what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

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Someone made a Titanic joke to me today, It was just plane wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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