What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

david weres the slug gone

What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

Why did paul macartny have plastic surgery? Because he wasn't happy with the looked

What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

Obama lin Baden.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

A dog is always in the pushup position.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Haha

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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