What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What rhymes with you? You.

Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

Knock, Knock Come in

Why did the bunny give you a funny look? It has epilepsy.

Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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