So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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What happened when they asked Steve if he was feeling blue? He confessed and went to prison for a long time for molesting that poor dog.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm bored of this how about you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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Mitt Romney is in the mormon mafia has magic underpants and invented Obama Care but he still lost to a Black guy Who is a fine president.

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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Why? Whats wrong?

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knock knock

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Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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