Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what happened to the man who ran straight into a brick wall he bounced off it, fell back, stumbled. he lifted his head up, looked at it, put his arm to his head. got up, groaned, dusted himself down, and walked towards the pub.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If you were a booger..................... I would get a tissue so i could blow my nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so...wonderful.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey Eliz, just a final thought, if and when I die (hey I am your step dad after all, dont forget I am four years older than you now! So ill die first anyway, hopefully) Promise me that you will call me on the phone and either yell SNAKE ANSWER ME SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! Or BOSS ANSWER ME BOOOOOOOOOOSS! Never mind, I never liked videogames ironically, but hey, its funny, Suddenly this Boss guy shows up, and I feel like I have something in common with someone! A game character anyway, and its a fucking boring game too, just sneaking around, then you got to well pay people to build shit and I shut it off by then... ...Finally the nurses are here... Those guys again, hey guys, I cant speak nor remember what button to press to delete shit, but I heard bogosexuals with an h, dont get the message, you see the man with broken fingers there, go get me female nurses or... They sleeping? And not with me? Okay guys, get me out of here, I am humiliating myself in front of my uh... Frienddaughtersisterthing as for the rest of you fucks, has it ever seemed like I have ever cared about your inferior opinions above my superhuma... I am drun or something huh guys? 60 MG valium? You fucking murderers! Well will that other dru.. Fine then... Nero The End? Seriously flaggots! I cant stop typing, just get me out of this... Wheelchair? When did that happen? Well roll me out then! And please you know, fill that code thing and the terms and all that.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

thumb_up thumb_down +27

An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops