What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

But who would want to sell us out and why?

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

haha black people :D

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

A baby seal walks into a club.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Jason. Jason who? The person who is answering the door hears a chainsaw start up and suddenly realizes that Jason is the murderer from Friday the Thirteenth. The person goes and gets their shotgun, ready to blast Jason's head of when he breaks in.

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

Q

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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