How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

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What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

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Comment is abusive and has been removed.

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Justin Bieber

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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