Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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where is the world?

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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What happened to the blind boy? He went deaf.. helen kellered....

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One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

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What's faster than a black man running with your tv His brother with your XBOX

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My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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Q.What happens when Torres scores A. He doesn't

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

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Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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