Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

I had my period 3 days ago.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

Thats malarious! When something is so funny that... malaria

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

girls basketball

Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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