The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

I'm going to Re-write History... History

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

I was watching this movie..... its over now.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

Why do teenagers, especially girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and creates a fanbase large enough to promote his career thus increasing profits which provides him a better quality of life and great financial future

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

why is 6 afraid of 7? i don't know, ask 6

What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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