Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yanter, Look it up

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats black and red all over? a chalk board

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops