What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

thomas hall= fuckin dikc

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

thumb_up thumb_down +41

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the boy laughing? Because

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what do you call a man in a hole Fill

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops