A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What will happen when a black person die they die

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

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A:knock, knock B:who's there A:come in B:come in who A:me I'm gay

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Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

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Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

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roses are red but violets are definately violet what retard made this rhyme

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

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What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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